TAN TAX

Yes the news in los angeles gives us all the important information. There is a new Federal Tanning Tax. It is a 10% tax when you fake-n-bake in a tanning bed. The people are outraged.

It is to raise something like $2.7 billion for health care reform. I may be biased because I have never used a tanning bed, but it makes perfect sense to me. If someone is going to put themselves purposely at higher risk of skin cancer by frying themselves in a human panini machine, and then tax money in the health care system which we are trying to universalize, will be used for them, then pay for it!

FURIA ROJA world cup 2010

I am born and raised in Los Angeles, I carry a US passport so ultimately my loyalties lie with the US National World Cup team. With that said I am also just a little obsessed with the Spanish Team. More than half the players are on the F C Barcelona team during the year, so it makes it easy to love them.

The other half of the team is from Real Madrid. I am not usually a fan but Casillas, the goalie is adorable, and Sergio Ramos is such a drama queen that he is fun to watch as he takes everything so personally.

There is so much talk about the teams potential to win this years world cup, as the European Champions. From a non-technical point of view, the reason they seem to me to have such a solid shot, is that they almost all play together during the year on club teams. Almost all. Our dear striker, El nino Fernando Torres, plays in the English Premier League.

Our boys play as a team, their cooperation is evident. All we need to win this world cup, well, is MESSI!!!!! Our back and mid field is solid. Even Barca's pretty boy Pique is bleeding all over the place taking hits for the team. But our shots aren't going in the goal. It makes me realize the Barcelona's team is mainly Catalan except our strikers. At least in my short 5 years of following the team. Ronaldihno (Brazil), Eto'o (Cameroon), Henri(France), Ibrahimovic (Sweden), Messi (Argentina).

David Villa was most recently signed to FC Barcelona, and is one of the strikers along with Torres on the Spanish team. Villa's almost-hat-trick today was sign that we may be back on track.

I'll keep watching and keep believing!

The BIKINI question

Every summer gyms use “Bikini Season” also known as “summer” to people who don’t live by the water, as a marketing ploy to register new members. Shape magazine features articles on getting a bikini-body and which shape suit suits you.

As I sit writing at a café in a small residential town in LA, a mother and her young daughter, no older than 7, walk by and a woman turns around at them, yells

“You’re fat,”

Pause.
Slowly enunciating as she aggressively continues,

“You’re a fat cow.”

The mother just stares at the woman. She checks her daughters face for a reaction. I must editorially mention that neither the mother nor the daughter is fat, not even close. The woman who accosted them was clearly suffering from some kind of (and I’m no medical expert) psychological or control issues, it was definitely more than just being mean, or bitter

Along side the shock two questions come to mind.
1. Apart from obvious health reasons, why is being called fat such a heartbreaking insult? 2. What kind of messages do we send to our children when teaching moments like these arise? As it is bikini season, after all.

I didn’t hear what the mother ended up saying to her daughter, she stayed calm, seemed taken aback to be honest, but she knew it was a crucial moment. You cannot smooth over a comment like that with a generic “She’s crazy, you’re not fat”, which is merely more putting people down for no reason, especially when the mother was probably hearing the worlds aimed at herself, and her societally accrued self-doubt and confidence issues.
If she replies, “No your not”, it can come off that she thinks fat equals bad and you don’t want to be this negative thing. There are levels of fat, of health and of consciousness, of course, but I am not referring to the health implications of obesity. I am talking about what if feels like to be marginalized and treated badly based on physical appearance. This links directly with why 8-year-old American girls are already talking about dieting. Worst-case scenario, this is when body consciousness turns into eating disorders, self-deprecating behaviors and low self-esteem.



Most importantly, how do I, as someone who has always been chubby, but also always been an athlete, and never had a balanced healthy relationship with food, try to teach healthy behaviors and associations towards food to my children, so when bikini season comes around each year, they can just put on their suits and hit the beach or pool without hesitation?

To be health conscious, but not obsessed, enjoy food, but realize its fuel and not filling voids or other unsatisfying parts of life. We cannot expect our parents to be perfect, but nor do we want all their baggage and issues stock piled in our lives as young people.

One answer seen most recently on Jamie Oliver’s new show The Food Revolution is taking seriously how much influence schools have over our children. What they eat all day, not only feeds their bodies, but their minds as well. Supplying food for energy to pay attention, but not to be hyperactive. I fully support giving schools the permission to demand healthier and natural, less processed foods in their cafeterias.

To be an example as parents, as friends, as teachers, as celebrities, is also imperative. Whatever we choose to keep in the fridge at home is what our children eat when they are home. If there is no soda, we drink water, juice, and milk. Let us be a part of raising a new generation of healthy, active, proud, young people.

FUTBOL

Soccer is still in its infancy here in America. That’s one European trend we haven’t followed suit on. In order to build a strong American team for the world cup, we need to be able to pick from the most elite pool. And though I love the American national team, and am excited for us to play in south Africa this year in the world cup, the reason that Brazil, Spain, and England, for example, have such strong teams is that young people grow up immersed in a culture where football (as it is better known in every other country in the world outside of the US) is mainstream. It’s accessible, all you need is a ball and your feet.

This time last year, when the Champions League was coming to the height of competition, I was living in Barcelona, Spain. I’ll spoil the story and for those who don’t follow soccer, Futbol Club Barcelona won every single competition for the year, a triplet of Champions League, King’s Cup (Copa del Rey) and Spanish League (La Liga).

After each round: Quarterfinals, Semifinals, big Liga games in between, the city banded together on the street, in bars, in their homes on their balconies in support of the home team. Flags draped the balconies, blue and red jerseys colored locals and tourists alike.

The night Midfielder Andres Iniesta scored in the last minute of a 0-0 game taking us into Champions League finals Barcelona's fate was sealed in history. After the game, everyone rushes to the streets. Cars are driving past honking to the rhythm of the team’s anthem, flags and horns flying out the windows. Crowds rush towards the jam that is the center of town, Plaza Catalunya, first 100.000, then 150,000, soon almost 200,000 people crowd to Canaletas the famous fountain at the top of the famous Ramblas promenade.

I squeeze my small frame in between hoards of screaming, jumping, dancing, smiling, crying, singing fans, Cule (followers) they call themselves. The air is red from all the fireworks and sparklers being legally set off. The magazine stands, metro signs, traffic lights, fountains, and lampposts are branches where perched fans call out to their fellow football lovers.

I magically find myself dead center of it all, and see no better place to experience the thrill of this win then climbing the closest lamp post at the top of La Rambla. My black satin mini dress does not stop me from hiking myself higher and higher to reach the 4 people already posted above the sea of painted, effervescent faces. I start singing the Hymno del Barca, in Catalan. Everyone claps along with me at the right moments, fists pumping in the air as we come to the end of the song, Barca Barca Baaaaarca! The adrenaline I imagine comparable to the players on the field of the 110.000 person stadium.

Now maybe I joined the bandwagon when I became a fan of one of the best club teams in the world. It is the inescapable energy of the Barca fans, the die hard “Sang Cule” (Those whose love of the team runs through the blood in their veins), and how the players are all so humble and feel the fans are the 12th player on their team, without which they cannot be Barca. How could I ever have resisted?

Definitions of Feminism

In today's LA times Opinion section Meghan Daum was talking about how Sarah Palin is calling herself a Feminist.

http://www.latimes.com/news/opinion/commentary/la-oe-0520-daum-fword-20100520,0,4933552.column

I have been a self-identified Feminist for years, lucky to have been raised by strong, opinionated, caring women who taught me to respect myself as a woman and see my special place in the world, but never that I was on a different playing field than men (be it above or below).

Over the years I have come to realize this is a unique way to grow up. I want to address first Palin calling herself a Feminist, and second, how individuals define feminism.

The Palin Issue. I admit it wouldn't be the first identifying marker I would place on her. I am assuming it's all politics to just get people talking about her (all press is good press). I am a believer in people being able to identify themselves how they see themselves. To give a polarizing example, gender identification. Those in the Trans community who consider their gender fluid, or who feel they were born into the body of a different sex than they feel to be, in my opinion, should be allowed to decide for themselves how they live in their own bodies.

With Palin the abortion argument obviously arises, as she is a staunch anti-abortionist, and I staunchly pro-choice. The reason I would choose not to exclude Palin from the group of people who identify themselves as Feminists is that I would be deciding for her how she feels, or what is right for her. I cannot do that. For the same reason I am pro-choice. Each person should be able to choose what they do with their body.

However, it is hypocritical for her to call herself Feminist and say she can define it for herself if she does not want other women to decide for THEMSELVES what they do with their bodies, ie the difficult decision of abortion.


DEFINING FEMINISM FOR OURSELVES

I pose the questions...

how do you define feminism in your own life?
How do you see Feminism in the world around you?
Do societal definitions and your own match or come into conflict?
How can we rectify them?


My definition has always been seeing, treating, and experiencing the genders equally. Of course there are innate qualities born to women and men, places our bodies and brains excel, but the idea of feminism is the idea that it does not make anyone better than anyone else, or more entitled

I'm and AUNTIE... o tia si preferias

life in LA isnt quite like normal... well except being at the beach in winter thats about as normal and pumpkin pie on thanksgiving :) and I love it.

so my big sis had her first baby. a boy. i'm the youngest so i have never raised a child. babysitting yes but, this is way more involved. i actually loved someone before they were born, is that even possible? yes. and i get up at night with her most of the week, and i love it. if i don't hold him in my arms for a few days there is something missing.

so the responsibility of teaching him spanish falls on me. that works. its actually kind of selfish. this way if i always speak to him (already going to be bilingual, this will make him trilingual... and american, almost unheard of here... totally typical in europe though... jealous much...yes.) then i will also always have someone in the family to speak spanish with and i will never forget the language. its a two way street. so thats my brilliant plan with my ridiculously adorable sobrino (nephew). ps not even kidding. beyond normal baby attractiveness.

Making the Grade?

I have been tutoring, most recently math an English essay writing.

There is a serious problem

Tutoring keeps turning into therapy or parenting

Mind you A+ students are less likely to be using a tutor, these are students looking for help because they aren't making the grades. But in a one on one setting, on that supports them, geometry that never made sense or writing with figurative language clicks.
My qualm is I spend more of my class time not teaching the material but reassuring them that a bad grade doesn't mean they are worth less or that their writing isn't good, it just means their teachers are looking for something different. They lack academic confidence. It became easy for me to get an A as more and more people told me how smart I was. There was a shift. My expectations of myself changed as my grades went up and they never fell.

Maybe everything in my life turns into a therapy session (daughter of two psychologists) but maybe more young people need someone to address the various reasons they are not succeeding in school. One of my girls doesn't have a lot of friends at school, which means harder to find a study partner (I told her, just ask to study with the smartest person in the class, you will not only soon be beating her, but also probably become friends).

I could go on but the truth is I am so priviledged. My parents made time to help me with homework, wree involved in my education, had the educational background to be able to help me even as I advanced through the years. There are so many factors.

One of my 7th grade students has been in America for 4 years now and has learned English remarkable well. She struggled with using imagery in her writing. But instead of instructing her how to improve that, she was only told to do something about it. So I ask her about a scene she knows well, getting off the bus after school and the walk home in downtown LA. Her personal voice, her experience was overwhelming. She only needed to be asked what she felt like, what she heard, what it felt like before the image was thick in my mind. She is nervous and on edge when she passes an alley or when her heart rate spikes and she feels uncomfortable when men yell at her as they pass in their cars because she is two years older than the other girls in her grade she is friends with and her body shows it.

I only wish I was not told for the first time how important my voice and experiences are in my writing. That they are valid.

So that is what I tell my students. And with this realization, they become more confident in their work, their personal truths on paper, their vulnerability. And they begin to see the academic success they deserve for all the effort they put.